Top O' the morning


Published on Saturday, November 14, 2009 2:44 PM CST



Terry Maddox

You’re invited to the Second Annual “Home Is Where the Art Is” fundraiser for East St. Tammany Habitat for Humanity this Friday night.  It takes place from 7-10 p.m. at the Northshore Harbor Center.

The event features food by Nathan’s Restaurant, beverages from Select Brands, Inc. and Champagne Beverages, live music by Audio Beach, and a live art auction of works by local artists and contributors.

Tickets are $75 per couple, $50 per individual, and are available by calling the Habitat office at 639-0656.

M   M   M

Speaking Select Brands, Dwayne Shockley emailed the following to me the other day:

I went to a dinner party last night, where I and other guests enjoyed copious amounts of alcohol. I awoke this morning not feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms; headache, nausea, chills, sore eyes, etc.           

From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately tested positive for what experts are now calling Wine Flu.  This debilitating condition is very serious - and it appears this is not an isolated case. 

Reports are flooding in from all around the country of others diagnosed with Wine Flu. To anyone that starts to exhibit the aforementioned telltale signs, experts are recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie down.

However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately rent a DVD and take some Tylenol (Tylenol seems to be the only drug available that has been proven to help combat this unusual type of flu).  Others are reporting a McDonald’s or some junk food can also help in some cases. 

If not, then further application of the original liquid, in similar quantities to the original dose, has been shown to do the trick. 

Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening and, if treated early, can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period. 

FOOTNOTE:  If you find you are complaining a lot, it may be that it has mutated into Whine Flu. This is particularly common in men and can quickly spread to their partners where the symptoms are detected as a serious case of eye rolling.

Terry Maddox is the publisher of  St. Tammany News.

 


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